Why is this so HARD to understand??

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The important thing the realize in stoichiometry is the balanced coefficients of the reaction allow you to change from moles of one material to moles of another material.  Everything else about the problem involves getting to the moles of the first material or getting back to the mass or number of particles of the second material.  Do not neglect the balanced coefficient ratios even if they are 1:1.  They'll help you understand when you are working with the first material or the second one.